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Saturday’s Secret Sauce: Enjoy the Little Things!

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Today I am a Dance Mom. Probably not like the ones on the show I’ve heard about, ha! But today I am the mom of a dancer. Today I’m not an Interior Designer, or a Product Designer, or a Blogger, or a Baker, or a Yogi, or Business Consultant. I am just a Dance Mom.

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Yesterday life was hard. You know those days when everything you do seems like a challenge? There seemed to be a problem or a complication with just about every part of the day, and I found it really hard to focus on the good. I found it difficult to count my blessings. Which when I stepped back, was silly. I was being spoiled. My problems were so teeny, tiny in the grand scheme of life. But in the trenches they seemed enormous. They weren’t. I complained a lot. It didn’t make be feel better.

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As much as I would like to think I have it all together, many days I feel like a mess. I feel like nothing’s working. I feel like a disaster. And many of you may be thinking “Wow, if you are a disaster, Tobi, then what am I?” But you see that’s the thing. We are all disasters. And we are all perfect. All at the same time. And we all look at each other and think that we are the only ones who don’t have it all together. That we are the only mess. We are all a mess. We must embrace the mess.

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But no matter how big of a mess I am, there are days that I am a Dance Mom. Even when I don’t have time to be a Dance Mom. Even when I have a million other things that I should be doing instead of spending 10 hours out of town at a dance competition, there is absolutely NOTHING more important. Because in between goals, there is a thing called life that has to be lived and enjoyed.

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Because while I am telling myself how important a billion other things are, and how anything else is a distraction, it’s not really true. And I don’t even mean it. Or believe it. People will survive without me. Designs will wait one more day. Clients and staff can make it through the weekend. But my daughter will not dance her little heart out without me on the sidelines. She will know if I am not there. And I wouldn’t miss it for the world.

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I think the REAL secret sauce above all other sauce is to enjoy the little things. It’s not a secret. We know this, right?  So why is it so hard to practice? Why do we make living so much harder than it has to be? Why do we keep joy at arm’s length? Why can’t we just lean into it, and relax, and drink it up? Why do we lie to ourselves about what we have time for? The truth is that we have absolutely the perfect amount of time to do what is really important to us. So it’s not a time issue, it’s a priority issue.

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Both Oxford Dictionary and the Urban Dictionary say the word that means “Calm down and relax” is Chillax. And that is my daughter’s mantra or as she calls it her “catch phrase”. In fact she deemed it her 2015 word of the year and she’s 10. Maybe it should have been mine. Obviously, she’s wise beyond her years. It’s most certainly her daily advice to me. “Chillax, Mom”. So today I will Chillax–both calm down AND relax. And I will breathe. And I will be. Just be. With her. Chillaxin’.

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Today my priority is Dance Mom. And I will be the best darn (and most Chillaxed) Dance Mom I can be. It’s funny, isn’t it? And it’s great. Life is Amazing…if we let it be.

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People are what’s important. Moments are Precious. The wise say “collect moments, not things”. That’s why they are wise. From the moment, a woman is pregnant everyone around us says, “It goes so fast!” “Soak it up.” “Time flies, they will be grown in a flash”. And before your baby is even here, you tire of hearing it. Ok already! Geez. we get it, it’s fast. But boy is it ever fast! It is so freaking fast. Ten years later seems like 10 seconds. It’s like lightening. If you blink…gone.

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I will never have this day again, so today I am a Dance Mom. And I will soak it in. I will engrave it in my memory. And I will enjoy every minute of it, because this my friends, is the Secret Sauce.

xo,

Tobi Signature


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